Let’s face it, holding on to the unnecessary is one way we’ve all been stopping ourselves from not only attaining our goals but living our best and most fulfilling lives. As mothers, learning to let go is counterintuitive and feels like a struggle that is ultimately impossible. Letting go is not only an efficient and effective tool in managing life’s most difficult moments, but it also assists with confronting situations that are out of our control.
Why is “letting go”, simple, yet so very difficult?
It goes without saying, life can be difficult even on the easiest of days. It is important that we learn to eliminate the added stress caused by those things which we have little to no control over. It’s time to release those toxic relationships that don’t mean us well, unhealthy habits that wear us down, and negative thoughts that hold us back from greatness. Mommas, It is time to LET GO!
Below are 10 tips that moms learning to let go can implement. Yes some of them may be out of your norm and may seem silly at first but even if you try two out the ten of these techniques and find success in them, then you are on your way!
Knowing how to relax, to let go, is important to be at ease with your body. It is also effective in managing stress.
One of the best ways a mom can relax is to literally BREATHE. It’s as simple as learning how to make breathing a conscious exercise. In the moments when you feel like the world is crashing down on top of you, slow down your breathing to half its normal rate and pause briefly between the in-breath and the out-breath.
Becoming aware of your breathing during times of stress will help you increase the flow of blood around our body, thereby giving you more energy. It helps you to have a clearer and calmer mind which in turn, helps in concentration, memory, positive thinking, and decision making.
Most people have used meditation for thousands of years to free and clear the mind. Doing so shouldn’t just involve burning candles and sitting in an upright position – it can simply be sitting comfortably, allowing thoughts to get into the mind, and pass through without interrupting them. As a mom learning to let go, when you do this for as little as ten minutes, it can be enough to free your mind from persistent or annoying thoughts. I’ve learned that mediating first thing in the morning and last thing at night works best for me. The way my back is set up (LOL), I find it far more comfortable to simply lay in bed and release any negative thoughts that are weighing me down. In the past, I’ve also used guided meditations like the one below to help me let go!
3. Positive Affirmation
Affirmations are positive statements that can help us challenge and overcome self-sabotaging and negative thoughts. You can use affirmations in any situation that you would like to see a positive change take place.
Affirmations are more effective when paired with other positive thinking and goal-setting procedures.
4. Revaluate Toxic Relationships
Sis, it’s time to let go of those relationships that mean you no good. The most serious warning signs of toxic relationships include forms of violence, abuse, or harassment, narcissism which you should immediately confront and deal with.
In most instances, the indicators of a toxic relationship are much more hidden.
The first, and simplest sign of a toxic relationship is persistent unhappiness. If a relationship stops being joyful, and rather always makes you feel angry, anxious, or sad, like you’ve sold out, it may be toxic. You may also find yourself envious of happy people. In order to reach a place of peace, you may have to reevaluate some of your relationships, even with those closest to you. Sometimes, these relationships can cause added stress.
5. Focus on your Self-Improvement
Self-improvement makes it possible for moms to identify their strengths and play on them. From careers to relationships – determining your strengths is vital for every area of your life.
It makes it possible for you to better understand what you are seeking and where you will probably thrive and succeed. It helps you set life goals and implement them. After all, you can only attain what you want when you know the exact thing you want.
Exercising focuses the body on its physical needs and takes your attention off your mind. It can also release endorphins and reduce cortisol, often bringing about a more positive and happier mood. This is useful in your journey of letting go. It’s as easy as a 30 minute walk each day.
7. Smile and Laugh
Research reveals that you will feel better when you smile and laugh, even when you don’t feel like it. Your brain records the movements of the muscles in your face when you smile and then release chemicals and hormones that make you feel good. Your improved emotions will make it easier to let go and change your thoughts.
8. Don’t be a People Pleaser
Being a chronic people pleaser doesn’t work for anyone. The added stress of making sure that you accommodate all people or make them all happy will end up leaving you drained and unfulfilled. You will have to embrace the fact that it is impossible to please everyone all the time. You will have to let this mentality go and learn to say no, even if you might feel a little bit selfish doing this. Trust me, learning to say no and actually doing it , is low key liberating.
9. Having It All
So many moms want it all – the great career, the perfect body or hair, and of course, the beautiful home. When it comes to being a mom, you can have things, you can be things, but it is impossible to have it all.
At some point, you have to decide what you want and what you are willing to let go of. You will have to learn how to keep this simple and put yourself first. There will be lines that you will have to draw.
10. Engage in self-care
When you feel hurt, it often feels like there is nothing but hurt. Practicing self-care can look like setting boundaries, going to therapy, saying no, engaging in activities that bring you comfort and joy, and listening to your own needs first. The more you implement self-care into your life, the more empowered you’ll be, and the easier it’ll be for you to let go.